I have a love, love HATE relationship with Facebook.
I love the fact that I can connect with old friends, keep up with new friends, see pictures of my growing nieces and nephews, and easily invite friends over for a Chilli Cookoff. I use Facebook for myself personally and for my blog.
I have been noticing more and more lately, that what used to be a social hangout for people to post ‘what’s new in their life’ status’, and connect with friends, has turned into a muddle of people complaining; fighting, posting photos of open wounds, passive aggressive behavior, posting endless political propaganda and trying to sell me stuff, ALL THE TIME!
If it wasn’t for the super cute photos of my nieces & nephews, and a great way for me to connect with my blog readers, I’d be gone!
Facebook won’t love us back – EVER
If you’re on Facebook as often as I am, you have a problem. I have a problem, most of us have a Facebook problem. I’ve already checked it 3 times writing this post and I hate myself for it! K – make that 4. I try really hard to “check myself” before I post a status. I often ask myself “why am I posting this?” ” to make people laugh? To get someone’s attention? To make someone jealous? To make fun of Taylor Swift?”
In my opinion – Here are 4 wrong motives for posting on Facebook.
1. You’re lonely
Human connectivity is as important to our overall health and well being.r. Without it, it can lead to serious depression, anxiety, social phobias and even physical health problems.
Many people use “introverted” as an excuse not to connect with other humans in person so they are using social media as their main source of connection. That’s not called being an introvert, that’s called a social disorder.
I feel more than not, that people who hate being around other people are actually struggling with a social phobia, and their disconnect will hurt them in the long run. Being an introvert is needing space to yourself to refuel, needing quiet to think and keeping your inner most self hidden from strangers, but being socially phobic is a fear of and avoidance of human connection all together.
You NEED people around you, even if you don’t like it!
Water is needed for our survival, but would you substitute it for soda? Yes some people do, and they suffer severe health consequences because of it. Facebook is an immediate quench for your loneliness but it’s not a substitute.
To combat loneliness you need face-to-face contact, human touch, and a reciprocal relationship. If you’re feeling cooped up, lonely, go out, call a friend, phone your mother, say hi to a stranger (they’re probably lonely too)
2. You need sympathy
There are severe negative consequences to chronic complaining. It’s toxic people! Seriously! It’s toxic to yourself and to those listening to it and it has got to stop.
Facebook is like a magnet to chronic complainers.
I love Facebook for the fact that if I have an injury, or am having a horrible day I can put out a post for prayers and receive some encouragement right away. I get that, it’s a powerful tool! and I have used it a lot!
What I am talking about is the day-to-day complaining about things we ALL go through. Like being tired, or hungry, or having to pee.
I try to remind myself that when I post a complaint, I am asking my past university professor, magazine editor, or neighbour, for their immediate sympathy for my human condition.
Who’s sympathy are you asking for?
3. You’re mad at someone
It is so NOT COOL when someone posts a “my spouse is a dweeb” post or vaguely posts a passive aggressive status to get a jab in.
You know how when you’re mad at someone, so work up a case in your mind against them and then the minute you see them again, your heart instantly softens? That’s called human connection.
I have so been guilty of stewing in my brain, ready to cut that person off forever! Then I see that person face-to-face and I remember how awesome they are and I feel so bad that I was ever mad at them to begin with. When you post it on Facebook, you can’t take it back.
4. You feel bad about yourself
Ever have days where you feel like you are the fattest, ugliest person in the world?! I do!
Where do you turn when you feel that way? A friend, your spouse, your bible or to Facebook?
I love a good selfie, because No ONE in my family EVER takes photos of ME! Every Christmas, birthday or holiday it’s me behind the camera. 100 years down the road there will be no photo evidence that I even existed. This is a fate for many mothers.
Why are you posting an unrealistically angled photo of you all photoshopped? Or one of you leaning over so I can see down your shirt? Is it because you’re 15, or is it because you feel bad about yourself? Posting photos or making status updates to get attention is fine, because we wouldn’t be doing it at all if we didn’t expect a like or two. However, don’t do it because you need an ego boost or you’re in need of approval. Find your approval within yourself, ask God what His heart is for you when you feel that way, be around uplifting people and save your “sexy selfies” for your man.
Have a great day! I’ll see you on Facebook!